“Good girls do not become friendly with boys,” I bet almost every girl/woman reading this post has come across this statement once or more in her lifetime. But strangely, over the course of life, I have realised that some of my best buddies are boys who have turned into gentlemen with decent jobs, a good family and social recognition. They have supported me through the thick and thin of life, and I owe many of them a lot. So, when you come to think of it, not listening to the stale idea actually worked out well for me, and I am sure for many of the lovely ladies there.
Over the years while growing up with just ‘friends’ whose sex doesn’t even mattered ever I have learnt some of the most valuable lessons of life. Though staying away from the opposite sex would have earned me a better name (among the people whom I didn’t even know), I am proud of not being all goody and choosing what I felt right at the moment. I gained a more holistic development.
While I am not encouraging anyone to be a rebel here, going after an ‘all-star’ social image may not work in your favour always.
You know yourself the best
The world is full of people who think they know it all. Just because they have a few grey hair (which even comes very early these days!), they believe they have all the right in the world to judge, preach and almost force people to abide. No one understands you better than yourself. Yes, age does bring some wisdom, but it’s the maturity that matters. No one has the right to hurt another person, emotionally or physically, so only if you mean to be mean to someone then your act is disgraceful. Else, right or wrong is based on perception. What could be a deadly sin for you could be a very normal affair in some other culture/community. As you grow, define your core values and stick by them. Don’t let others’ judgement cloud your behaviour or happiness.
Everyone loves to be right
Most of us love to be pass judgements, put people in compartments, form our beliefs on casual statements. Trust your gut feeling always. Whenever you will try to break the norm, most of the people around will stand against. This is the time to stay strong and hold on to your beliefs. It takes courage to challenge the routine and if you are thinking of this, you still have the mindset to grow. Change is feared by most of us and people are usually quick to transfer the fear. There could be a few encouraging ones too. All said and done weigh your options and if you feel uncomfortable in the present situation, chuck the urge of staying good in everyone’s books and take the leap for creating a better version of yourself. People who truly care will eventually support you and will be happy for your growth. The satisfaction achieved in the process will be unmatched.
Follow your purpose
As we mature our needs change. From the need of being socially recognised you will gradually move towards finding more meaningful purpose to your life and then again you will face criticism, judgement and advice. Most of the things which you considered immensely important at one point of your life will eventually lose their significance. This is natural. This shows you are growing emotionally. Identify your new-found interests and again instead of doing what will just earn you a good name, do what you feel would truly satisfy your soul, will make another one happy at soul level and not just cursory level.
Do what you love and not just what others love about you. This way you will be living the life you want not the one they want you to live. Listen to the advice of your close ones and elders and strike a balance between your desires and what their wisdom suggests. Try to go beyond the mundane sometimes, feel the excitement and evolve!